Pray For Me...

Tomorrow morning I am embarking on a new journey. It's time to make some life changing decisions (mostly health related), and it's going to be hard. I know it's going to be hard because I've tried this before and never had the strength to see it through.

I'll admit I'm lazy by nature, and what I'm attempting to do doesn't work well with laziness.

I will need willpower, determination, strength, and lots of grace for this to work. My kids are my inspiration and although that sounds like enough, it will take dying to myself and relying on Christ to lead me every moment of every day.

Prayers accepted... any kind, any place, any way... I will take them all! :)

Big News!

I almost forgot the most important recent development in my life!

Zack accepted Jesus as his personal savior! What an answer to prayer! He's so excited about it and sweet... listening to his shaky little voice pray to Jesus to come live in his heart and save him from his sins so he won't have to go "down to the bad place" just touched my heart like nothing ever has!

Thank you, thank you, thank you Jesus for loving us so much!

I can't wait to see him grow in the Lord. We're working through a book our pastor gave him to help him understand and solidify his decision before he gets baptized. When we discussed baptism, he said, "Mom, I don't even care if I get my clothes wet!" :)

Time Flies

Wow. It's been a while since I posted. Since then things have been crazy, but that's life!

AJ's mom didn't have surgery. They ran into complications, and are going to pursue radiation instead. Hopefully that will do the job, but only time will tell. Still waiting to hear when this will transpire.

AJ has been crazy busy at work. We haven't seen much of him in the past couple of months between work and his night classes. Thankfully, he finished his class last week and work is slowing down a bit, so hopefully he will be home more!

Baby Kenly Rae, my new niece, was born on March 5. The kids and I were able to go see them during spring break. She is precious, of course, and she and her mom and dad are doing well.

Also got to see the rest of my siblings and parents that weekend, which was nice. The trip ended on a weird note, mostly because I can't keep my mouth shut, but otherwise it was really good to see everyone. Apparently I am more of a drama queen than I thought.

I am addicted to Facebook quizzes. I know, what a nerd. But they're fun and whimsical and just a nice break from grown up life. Maybe I have too much time on my hands, but I'm enjoying it nonetheless.

My Signature Homestyles business has hit a roadblock. People seem excited about the products, but no one wants to have a show. I know the economy is iffy right now, but come on folks! I see people loading up their carts and shopping bags with household items at Walmart, Target, Lowe's, the mall... and they're spending MONEY on those items. I can offer them awesome items FOR FREE. What's the deal? I need bookings to keep the ball rolling, and even if they don't want to do live shows, I can offer the option to do catalog shows. Catalog shows are awesome because I don't have to be there... so they can be done anywhere, anytime! All it takes is the "host" showing a catalog to the people they come into contact with and taking orders. At any rate, I need to do something before I get completely discouraged and give up.

We have plans to do some home improvements around here. Hopefully that will work out soon. It's daunting... it will require refinancing the house, getting a home improvement loan, etc... But we need to get some things done to make it more functional.

Somehow I got roped in to being assistant VBS director this summer. I know it will be fun, but at this very moment I am not looking forward to the preparation. Lots to do, with little time to do it.

As much as I would love to sit here all day and continue the list of things going on in my life, I need to go do "real" stuff! Besides, I need to spend some time on facebook before I do chores! LOL! :)

Prayer

Today is going to be a long day. AJ's mom is currently in surgery at Zale Lipshy in Dallas. She's having her brain tumor removed. She will be in surgery for 5 hours and in ICU for 24 hours.

AJ's there with his dad and one of his sisters. The kids are missing him and they know something's not right.

Zoe's sick... running fever and coughing.

I'm a worry-wart no matter how hard I try not to be.

Going back to prayer...

Today's fences

I woke up this morning and immediately all the yucky, shmucky started creeping in. Worry, frustration, the darkness of the unknown.

Where's my white picket fence??? I started frantically searching...

Then I saw my son's big bright smile, scruffy slept-on hair and I accepted his good morning hug and kiss complete with sleepy, dragon breath. White picket fence #1.

Opened my email, read today's devotional. Excerpt:
"In the dark, we have two choices. We can take matters into our own hands, turning to drugs or alcohol to numb our pain, seeking out friends' advice, or the latest self-help book, never really knowing if any of them is the way to healing and wholeness. Or we can look to God. We can open His Word and know that He guarantees healing and wholeness."
White picket fence #2.

Good morning, Life. Thank you, Jesus... for loving me and lifting me up in spite of myself.

White Picket Fences

I'm dreaming of white picket fences. Hence the new background. Don't know how long I'll keep it, but it's there for now.

What does that mean? I'm dreaming of happy times, bright futures, wonderful memories... anything and everything to stay positive in this ever-deepening sea of doom and gloom we call life today.

I don't know how long it will last, but for right now, I choose to stay positive. I've got too much on my plate that tries to drag me down everyday, and those are things I need to deal with and let go of. But for right now, that doesn't seem too daunting.

It might tomorrow, but hopefully I'll dream of white picket fences and wake up content with whatever tomorrow brings. And if I'm not content, I'll just change it.

Who's gonna stop me? :)

Sad

I hate it when that old devil starts in on me first thing Monday morning. It makes it hard to get out of the pit and on with life.

I have so much I need to be doing and yet, here I sit. I haven't blogged in ages and I'm choosing to do it now when I should be doing a million other things. That's part of that old devil interfering again.

This morning I caught up on my Proverbs 31 devotionals that I haven't read for the past several days. It's amazing how God works. Had I read them on the days I was supposed to, they might not have had much impact... but today, when the world feels like it is crumbling around me, those carefully written words were spot on.

Three things stuck out:
1. I need to write a letter to God outlining how I'm feeling and
2. in that letter surrender my fears and frustrations and then ask for His
3. Wisdom... for my life and future.

Sounds so simple. So why am I doing this instead of that?

Nothing

So I haven't blogged in quite a while. Apparently I have nothing to say. I know... how odd is that?